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from Islamic Feelings Podcast

Women in Islam Q&A

Life growing up as a Muslim woman was always very different because I originally grew up in New York. Growing up in New York, I was around a lot of Muslims, but when I was 13, I moved to another state. This state had less Muslims, which led me to feel left out in middle school and high school. As I was the only Muslim in the school, I felt like I had to hide it and didn’t like the feeling of that.

The beginning was nice because I was around a lot of Muslim friends, but when I moved, things became more difficult. I would say that whoever you’re around makes your experience a lot better.

I would say my biggest challenge is dealing with Islamophobia. I feel like you can’t instantly tell when a guy is Muslim versus a woman.

I would also say that not being taken seriously in and out of the Muslim community is also a huge struggle. Outside, you’re constantly taunted for being “oppressed” and for wearing the hijab. While within the Muslim community, we are talked down to and told we are not good enough.


Recently, my favorite verse has been “Competition for more ˹gains˺ diverts you ˹from Allah˺,” (102:1). It reminds me that we’re busy with worldly increase, constantly competing with one another to get into a program or get a good job, while forgetting the Akhirah.

I would say the concept of a higher purpose. For example, life is not as simple as me and you existing, and then we're going to die. In Islam, there is something greater for us at the end.

I think a human being needs a higher purpose to live a more purposeful life. We need something that inspires us and makes us happy and motivated everyday. If not, you’ll feel like you’re living the same day over and over again.

I think Islam provides a higher purpose with things as simple as the structure of praying five times a day. I don’t know what I’m going to do everyday, but I know I’m going to pray five times that day.

Just knowing that Allah is there and knowing that there is a higher purpose than just this life.

I went to a school that had no hijabis and no Muslims. To the point that my school would hold Christian bible clubs and events. So when I started wearing the hijab, I would think to myself, If Islam is perfect, why am I scared? If Islam is the right path, then why do I have to bury the way I feel? Just because the people around me are non-Muslims does not remove the fact that I know what’s right.

This is what led me to research different religions and read different scriptures. Once I came to the conclusion that Islam is the truth, I put on the hijab.

The other basic point is that it is a sin if you don’t. I hear people making excuses saying you don’t have to wear the hijab because times are different, but because of all the fitna around us, I think the hijab is more necessary now than ever before.

My point is that wearing the hijab is Allah’s commandment, and it is there for a reason, whether you understand the wisdom behind it or not.

I think having to be so different, questioning why it was different, and then figuring out why Islam is right motivated me to put on the hijab. Because if I’m on the right path, why am I scared?

After I moved from New York, I was lonely and had no Muslims to talk to. I can’t really talk to non-Muslims about a lot of my problems because they won't understand my religious problems or when I’m talking about something in Islam.

So, one day I sat bored in my closet and thought to myself, “I like to talk, so let me make a podcast." I would just sit in my closet and record myself talking. I only had like 6 views, and 3 of them were me.

Eventually, three of my episodes talking about my journey to finding Islam went viral on TikTok. This just led to things changing and becoming more serious. My podcast is a place for me to vent out things without anybody knowing me.

A final point is having a higher purpose, as I mentioned before. I can’t die knowing that all I had was some diploma. I want to know that I left something that will benefit people (inshAllah).

I wouldn’t say I’ve been discriminated against, but I have had side jabs and nasty looks. I've had people try to insult me by calling me “the girl with the thing on her head,"  but I wouldn’t count it as full on discrimination.

I think, as a Muslim woman, there are things you are supposed to do. You’re expected to be a good wife, daughter, mother, etc. Though I think the most important thing is being a good worshipper of Allah. As long as you are a good worshipper of Allah, He will allow you to play well in those other roles.

As cliche as it sounds, the first priority is to focus on your relationship with Allah. Then things will work their way, at their time. If they end up not working out, then you know it’s Allah’s decree.

If you learn to make it your priority to worship Allah wholeheartedly, then things in your life will become more bearable.

On the other hand, I would also tell women not to get consumed in the roles you play. Sometimes you’ll meet a Muslim woman, and she will be like, “I’m a mom of 3, I’m married, and I’m a doctor." My point is, you are so much more than a mom, a doctor, or a wife. You are a human being with likes, dislikes, and acts of worship you do everyday.

My advice is to not limit yourselves to the roles that you have to play; remember, the greatest thing you’re going to do is worship Allah. Take time to improve yourself, because that will benefit you in all you do.

I would say some misconceptions about women in Islam are that they are oppressed, unhappy, and don’t have a life. This couldn’t be further from the truth.

I think you don’t really question something as long as it’s around you. So, when I grew up around more Muslim people, I didn’t really think about or question Islam, but when I moved away from New York, I felt different and wanted to know why I was different.

I grew up in a very strict Muslim household. We play the Athan five times a day in my house, and I’ve been praying since I was required to. My parents taught me how to pray with Sunnah, so when I got older, I was surprised that some people only prayed Fard prayers. I don’t mean to sound arrogant or mean, but that’s why I was taught.

So, I think slowly, over time, it became more of a questioning thing that began to itch me.

I think you don’t really question something as long as it’s around you. So, when I grew up around more Muslim people and Muslim friends, I didn’t really think about it.

And when I moved away, the more I felt different, the more I wanted to know why I was different. I remember, in particular, that when I was in my junior or senior year of high school, I was assigned a seat at a table with some people, and they were Christians. They started asking me questions about my faith, and at this point I had good knowledge on Islam, so I could give them good answers and dawah, while they couldn’t give me answers about my questions about Christianity. This wasn’t the case before, though.

Before, I would ask myself, If Islam is the truth, why don’t I feel it? Am I just doing Sujood (prostration) everyday for no reason? I began questioning things and thought there had to be something greater to how I was feeling. I also used to see people crying while reading the Quran or while praying, and I didn’t understand why they were crying because I lacked khushoo (concentration) and understanding of the deen.

I think it really began when I learned about the trinity and realized it made absolutely no sense. I questioned how, despite it making no sense, billions of Christians worship Jesus. So I thought to myself, there’s no way all these people are wrong; they have to know something I’m missing. How has nobody looked at the trinity and seen how wrong it looks?


So, I started to dig up answers for that. I eventually read three really good books that I would really recommend:

  • - MisGod’ed (A book about Abrahamic religion pathways)
  • - My great love for Jesus led me to Islam
  • - I feel like somebody lied to me

In one of these books, I came across a chart that compared how the prophets were described in the Bible and the Quran. The differences I found were insane. For example, the story of Prophet Lut (AS) in the Bible says he impregnates his own daughter. I’m like, “wow”, it kind of insane to me. Do we not read about or talk about this?

One day I decided I wanted to visit a church, but I read online that it was haram (impermissible), so I didn’t know what to do. I thought about it for a while, but never ended up going.

I did one time go to a second-hand bookshop, and I saw a bible there and wanted to get it. So I quickly took out my phone and looked up if buying a bible haram. And the first link said yes, so I had to leave it. My other concern about buying it, was that if my dad or my mom see it, then they’ll be worried.

So, I just sat there late at night and made Google documents comparing everything I researched. The problem I have with Judaism is that a lot of it is based on family, lineage, and being born as a Jew. It didn’t seem like an open religion, and I didn’t like that.

With Christianity, my main issue was the trinity. I found it to be illogical. My belief is that if your foundation is not good, anything you put on that foundation will collapse.

So you can have really beautiful and nice bible verses and stories, but if your creed and the foundational base of your religion makes absolutely no sense, then I don’t care what you sprinkle on top; you can’t explain how God is 3 in 1. There are also a lot of Bible verses that contradict that.

Even then, I knew and was confident that the Quran had not been changed. That is something that will stay until the end of time. We have hafizes (memorizers of the Quran), so even if somebody were to rip up or take away all the Qurans from the face of the earth, we would generate more really fast because people are hafizes.

There’s a lot of things about Islam that kind of guided me to it. Scientific miracles was obviously one of them. Allah gave us our brain and logical reasoning for a purpose; let’s use it.

When you use your logic on the trinity, it makes absolutely no sense. I’m not saying that to sound biased, I really, at one point, wanted to see if Christianity was the truth. I was ready to get kicked out of my house if that meant Christianity was the truth, but it wasn’t. It made no sense.

Islam started to make more sense with miracles, with understanding of what it is, what the Quran is, and who we worship. Another thing is, of course, reading and learning about the Seerah, because the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ went through so much, much more than anyone can. His perseverance and faith is significantly stronger than we are.

Another is the miracles of the prophets. Prophet Yunus’ (AS) miracle always brought me back and gave me more tawaqul (trust in Allah), because I’m sure if there’s hope in the belly of a whale, then there’s hope anywhere.

My hope is for them to become more educated on this deen (religion). As opposed to having to hear the education from cultural norms rather than true Islam. We have too much culture mixed in with our religion. I hope in the future we can have more women in our Ummah going to Islamic schools, becoming alimahs, and learning things to then teach their children. It is time to have Muslim women teach deen without the correlation of culture coming in. Leave Fiqh as Fiqh without the influence of cultural norms.

You’ll always have some brother tell you not to do it. First of all, I don’t show my face on social media because I follow the opinion that women shouldn’t. I know some people do and some don’t, whatever floats your boat.

I actually had a well-known brother at the time who did dawah, tell me you might want to think about not doing a podcast because of your voice. I responded by telling him my voice is not an awrah! Another time, when my podcast was still very small, a different brother told me, “If you have better things to do with your time, then go ahead and do them." So I did, and Islamic Feelings came to be.

I think, as a woman, you should do dawah. Why is it important? It’s important because the prophet's ﷺ wives used to do these things. If you want to do physical face-to-face, then that should only be with another woman.

When you’re on social media, I would recommend being very careful. I would recommend not showing your face and keeping a low-key persona. Don’t answer pointless DMs from men and talk about your faith. You don’t have to be an open book to help other Muslim women; I'm not an open book. I talk a lot on my podcast, but people still don’t know some basic things about me. That’s the point, though; people are not supposed to be that involved in your life.

Another piece of advice I would give is to not be consumed by what people are going to say. You’re going to hear a lot of “This is not a good person” or “This person doesn’t know what they’re talking about.”.

I have had so many scholars come on my podcast and answer Fiqh-related questions because I’m honest and recognize that I can’t answer them. I’m not qualified to answer Fiqh-related questions, so I’m not going to act like I am.

This goes onto my next advice: give dawah in your circle. Don’t go online talking about the differences in Fiqh opinions when you’re not educated on it. You do not want to spread false information.

One of the rules I have in my girls only Discord is that you’re not allowed to answer Fiqh questions unless you have a qualification. If you still answer them and you know it’s a rule to not answer them, then you get two strikes, and if you do it again, then you’re out.

An example of this is if someone asks if doing your eyebrows is haram and someone responds yes, then this is a problem because they’re spreading misguidance. Be careful about spreading misinformation and misguidance.

I started my podcast when I was 17, and I recently turned 20. I originally grew up around a lot of Muslims in Brooklyn, New York. When I was 13, I moved to a state with a smaller amount of Muslims.

I have created different Muslim youth groups where I live. We meet up 1-2 times a month to do different halaqas or events.

I firmly believe people should take the time to answer their questions about Islam. Always get your questions answered; don’t even leave one question unanswered or uncertain.

I look at examples like the early Muslims and how they would travel deserts just to get one hadith. If they would travel such distances for Hadiths they are certain about, then we should travel further to get our questions answered. We tend to be too busy searching up different Atheist or Christian arguments, but we look past our own religion.

I would recommend people listen to lectures, but more importantly, read beneficial Islamic books, as you will learn more.

I am currently trying to memorize the Quran. I am a full-time student and love cooking and baking.